Little Blog Pills

When you are a couple, there are a lot of things you must take care of if you want to make sure that your partner is happy and he/she stays with you for the rest of your life…or at least for a long time. One of this things is the use of words, because in a couple the more yuo talk, the better it is. So, why is it so important to talk not only in a love relationship, but also in every single relationship you have?

know what’s going on.

The problem of every single human being is that we don’t have superpowers. It would be great to be gifted my some incredible abilities, but we are not. So, we are just regular people. Why am i telling this? Well, because one of the most wanted superpowers is mind reading. How awesome would it be? As i said, we don’t have superpower, so we can forget about reading someone else’s mind.

Which means that we have no idea what’s going on in other people’s mind and lives. In our existance we have only to choices: we can either guess and see what happens or ask about it. In the first case, you have 50/50 chances to get it right and you don’t have to get throught some troubles of unpleasent moments, in the second case you will have 100% chances to get it right, but you maybe must get through a painful conversation.

Even if it is a risky move, i will always choose for the second case. I would rather get through a painful moment, but know the truth than guessing and avoiding bad moments. I don’t living in doubts. The good thing is that at least i know what i need to know to fix things. There is no other way to be happy in a relationship. Asking is always the perfect way to stay away from trouble and problems. There is a reason why men and women have very hard time to understand the other: one doesn’t want to ask and the other doesn’t really want to answer. When the communication is bad, also the love story is bad.

Deeper connection.

Words are, together with the body language, the only two ways we have to communicate something. However, words are way much more powerful. Let’s think that you see your partner angry. You can recognize that the one you love is furios, but without words you have no idea why. You can guess all day long, but as long as you don’t ask, you can even think to start to solve your partner’s problems. Body language only works if you use words to explain that specific look or that posture previosily. Without words, all the things people do are basically nonsense.

The more you talk, the deeper the connection between you two…and the deeper the connection, the less words you need to communicate. This is insane, but it’s true. There is a reason why well oiled couple use less words, because with one look or with one specific move both know what is requestes or is about to happen. Why is that? Because in the early stage in their life together, they have talked a lot. Every single time one of the two had a specific body language, the other asked and he/she was willing to go down that road and understand thing otherwise he/she would have never understood.

Now, years later, in that same couple words are in lot of cases are no requested anymore. One look and one gesture can tell an entire story, describe an emotion or ask for something very specific. This is what i call a deep connection: the couple talks without saying a word. To be honest, can you name a deeper connection that the one where words are no needed but the people involved understand each other perfectly?

trust.

If you talk, not only you share thing with the other, but you also share the way you think. It’s incredible how many things you can learn from someone with just a little small talk. One word said with a specific body language and with a specific tone can tell a lot about someone.

And this is crucial if you want to create a sort of trust with the other. Telling always the truth is awesome and it helps a lot. However, it may happen that, in good faith, the other will tell a little lies. Not a huge one, but the other can have a little secret. Now, if you two don’t talk a lot and you don’t know each other so well, you will never detect the lie. If you know that person way too well, you will realise immediately he/she is telling you a lie and in that moment, you have two choices: trying to find the truth or trust the other. You can try to find the truth, but it can be bad for you. Let’s imagine that your partner is planning a trip or a birthday party. Do you really want to riun the surprise? There is only one wise choice to make: trust your partner.

The only way to trust someone is to believe in what he/she says. There is no other way to trust someone. The more the couple talks, the more the two can understand how the other think and what the other’s body do when he/she is caught up in a lie. If you don’t talk there is no way in hell you will find out what you need to know. With a good coomunication you can live happier and you don’t need to worry about anything.

growing.

Even if the couple is one entity, we still talk about two different people with different lives, opinions and way to see the world around them. At one point, the two will hear or read a news somewhere and they will start to talk about it. From there, the two will start a very long conversation about so many other things.

The only question you must have in mind is the following one: “how do i want to lead this conversation?” Because there are only two ways to have a conversation with your partner: trying to be right or trying to learn something new. You don’t have any other choice.

My opinion? Avoid the fight at any cost. Fighting to have right is a stupid choice. In the end, you might have right but at what cost? Just let it go. The only smart thing you have to do is talking, expressing your emotions and ideas about something, listen what the other say and build your own opinion from there. Don’t try to convince the other that your mentality is better. The goal in talking is not making sure that you look like the one who is right, but simply share opinions and see if there is a way you can be better after the conversation.

better sexual life.

We all know that getting dirty in the bedroom is a very important part in a relationship. Intimacy bring the couple closer and put the whole relationship on a complete another level. This is nice…if things are done properly. I am wondering, how can you know what to do in bed, to make sure that your partner is happy in bed?

Technically you can try until you don’t get what he/she needs. The only question i have is: are you sure to have all that time? Because maybe you partner is patient, maybe he/she’s not. When he/she’s not patient, the risk that he/she leaves you, because you are bad in what you do, is pretty high. You can’t honeslty afford to waste weeks or even months of your and your partner’s time to figure out on your own what you need to do to be great.

There is a shortcut for all your problems: ask! Use the words and your mouth to ask “hey honey, what do you like in bed?” This is not a weird or emberrasing question at all. On the contrary: if you show that you want to make your partner happy he/she will be glad about it and you can have all the fun you have. I honestly don’t understand why people have funny reaction if sex is the main topic. It’s a natural thing and it’s also important to tell your partner what you like, so he/she can do things as you want. There is nothing worst than wasting time in bed.

You don’t have to guess anymore. With few simple question, you will know exactly what he/she wants and how she wants it. Once you know, the only thing you have to do is try and be better with the practice. How cool is that!

final conclusions.

Talking makes you happy. No question about it. The more you talk, the more you know and the less problem you will have. Because living in the truth, even if it’s painful, is one million times better than living in guesses.

Thanks for reading. If you like the post, feel free to leave a like, a comment and don’t forget to follow my blog and share the content on your social media.

With Love

Mauro.